What is a connection?
It is a link between people and things.
Connection is broken down into 2 categories:
-
Connection
-
Disconnection
-
Relationships
-
Spending time with people
-
Sharing your feelings
-
Sharing your interests
-
Being comfortable being yourself
-
Listening
-
Being there for others
-
Eating meals together
-
Holding space for emotion
Disconnection
What is disconnection?
It is the lack of links between people and things.
What does disconnection look like?
-
Lack of relationships
-
Not spending time with people
-
Not sharing your feelings
-
Not sharing your interests
-
Not being comfortable being yourself
-
Not listening
-
Not being there for others
-
Not eating meals with people
-
Isolation
Strategies For Connection
Regulate the environment
What is a regulated environment?
It is an environment that is calm and relaxing.
What does a regulated environment look like?
-
Has plants and natural elements
-
Smells good
-
Has reduced noise
-
Has reduced distraction
-
Is comfortable
-
Is welcoming
-
Is relaxing
-
Has photographs
-
Has a diffuser and oils
Exploring strengths
What are strengths?
Tasks or actions that you can do well.
What do strengths look like?
-
Being good with computers
-
Being good at science
-
Being good at a sport
-
Being good at math
-
Being good at playing music
-
Being good at art
-
Being creative
-
Being caring
-
Being good with animals
-
Being open
-
Being thoughtful
-
Being positive
-
Being resilient
-
Being passionate
-
Having patience
Exploring interests
What are interests?
Things that cause your attention to focus on something.
What do interests look like?
-
Theater
-
Hockey
-
Art
-
Music
-
Travelling
-
Video games
-
Cooking
-
Animals
-
Coding
-
Hair and make up
-
Photography
-
Computers
Strengthen connection with Bryan Post’s 10/20/10 rule
What is the 10/20/10 rule?
Giving someone or letting someone give you 10 minutes of quality time and attention first thing in the morning, 20 minutes in the afternoon and 10 minutes in the evening.
What does the 10/20/10 rule look like?
-
Give 10 minutes of quality time and attention first thing in the morning (example: make and eat breakfast together)
-
Give 20 minutes of quality time and attention in the afternoon (example: go for a walk and talk)
-
Give 10 minutes of quality time and attention in the evening (example: read together)
Connection before direction
People do not listen to people they think that don’t like them. Seek out connection before you give direction.
-
Show interest in peoples strengths
-
Show interest in peoples interests
-
Refer to them by their name
-
Meet people where they are at
-
Eat together
Forgiveness
What is forgiveness
The action or process of forgiving or being forgiven.
What does forgiveness look like?
-
No longer holding something against someone
-
No longer bringing something up
-
No longer talking about something behind someone’s back
-
Moving on
-
Saying you are sorry
-
Expressing how you feel
-
Letting go