It is being able to manage your emotions. It is staying within your window of tolerance during times of distress. It is recognizing that you need to calm yourself.
Emotional regulation is broken down into 2 categories:
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Emotional regulation
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Emotional dysregulation
A video that helps explain emotional regulation
What does emotional regulation look like?
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You are calm
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You are able to think
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You are able to self soothe
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You are able to use strategies to calm yourself
What is emotional dysregulation?
It is not staying within your window of tolerance during times of distress. You are not able to recognize that you need to calm yourself or know how to calm yourself in that moment.
What does emotional dysregulation look like?
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You are not calm
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You are not able to think
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You cannot self soothe
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You cannot use strategies to calm yourself
What is emotional co-regulation?
It is supporting someone who is dysregulated. You are trying to calm that person by coaching them through the things that can calm them.
What does emotional co regulation look like?
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Relationships and connections
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Helping someone make sense of things during times of distress
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Guiding someone through strategies to calm themselves
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Guiding someone through deep breathing
Guessing the feelings video
Relationships
Emotional regulation is taught through relationships. You can only learn how to regulate emotion by being dysregulated and having someone show you how to calm yourself in times of distress.
You cannot learn in dysregulation
When you are dysregulated your lid is flipped, you are in fight, flight or freeze. You do not have access to everything you have learned. You cannot learn in this state.
